Lars Toomre

Some Personal Thoughts and Trivia

Mark Twain

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Reader Suppose You Were An Idiot

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Right To Use Editorial 'We'

Blonde model Heather Knox was Playboy's Playmate of the Month for January 2012

Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

None But Birds Should Go Out Early

Wisdom teaches us that none but birds should go out early, and that not even birds should do it unless they are out of worms.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

There Is No Humor In Heaven

The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in Heaven.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Enough To Make A Body Ashamed Of The Human Race

Brunette beauty Olivia Culpo was Miss Rhode Island USA 2012

It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Good Protections Against Temptation

There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Medical Practice Changes

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Higher and Nobler To Be Kind

It is higher and nobler to be kind.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Stay At The Present Moment Now

Don't live in the past, don't ponder about the future, stay at the PRESENT moment NOW...always.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Speak Out And Remove All Doubt

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Do The Thing You Fear Most

Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Merely Fluid Prejudice

The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

If You Always Do What You Have Always Done

If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you always got.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Throw Off The Bowlines

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Through Some Terrible Things

Blonde actress Amber Lancaster poses at Hollywood event in a blue dress

I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Age Is An Issue Of Mind Over Matter

Brunette Polish beauty Amanda Streich was Playboy's Playmate of the Month for December 2012

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

When Imagination Not In Focus

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

From "A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court

Human Pride Is Not Worthwhile

Human pride is not worthwhile; there is always something lying in wait to take the wind out of it.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Charm About The Forbidden

Blonde Audrey Allen in white shorts was Playboy's Playmate of the Month for June 2013

There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.

Celebrated American author and humorist (1835 - 1910)

Keep Away From People Who Try To Belittle Your Ambitions

Brunette beauty Jamie Edmondson was Playboy's Playmate of the Month for January 2010

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. When you are seeking to bring big plans to fruition, it is important with whom you regularly associate. Hang out with friends who are like-minded and who are also designing purpose-filled lives. Similarly, be that kind of a friend for your friends.

From Advice to Youth (1835 - 1910)